We began our meeting by reading aloud together the Welcoming Words. This is how they end: "We who stutter, and those who support and help us, are not alone. Together we are strong." It was a particularly useful reminder, since in the last few weeks many of us have had challenges with our speech.
Stuttering goes through cycles. These are familiar to each of us. For weeks at a time fluency just seems to happen. Breath, phrasing, articulation are all in sync. Then out of the blue a block strikes, and, as if a magic spell was lifted, everything becomes difficult. It's a struggle to get almost every word out. Even in easy speaking situations we get stuck, our voice gets cut off, our speech is choppy and tense.
Sometimes the reason this happens is clear: lack of sleep, stress at work, anxiety, increased pressures bearing down from every direction. Other times, there's no rhyme or reason to it. I used to spend a lot of time asking why--why is this happening to me, why isn't it going away no matter how hard I try? But I've come to think that the "why" isn't so important. How we deal with it is.
Here are some of the coping mechanisms our group members have tried:
- being open with others about what's happening
- using a stuttering modification technique (like easy onset or voluntary stuttering)
- practicing acceptance and focusing on other good qualities we have
- if possible, postponing challenging speaking situations until the rough patch passes
That's something to keep in mind: it will pass. It might feel like it's going to last forever, but it won't. Meanwhile, you can take comfort in the fact that you're not alone. You don't have to go through this difficult time by yourself. Talk to a friend. Come to a support group meeting. And remember that everybody struggles with one thing or another all the time. That doesn't make people less interesting, likable or worth listening to. Actually, it makes them more so.
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