One of my biggest fears as a person who stutters is that in case of an emergency I'm going to block so hard that I won't be able to make a 911 call to save someone's life. I was much encouraged and relieved this week when a group member shared how during a very difficult and high-stress situation he didn't stutter and was able to do the right thing. Often we get through tough times by the skin of our teeth; it's great to be reminded that there are times when we do so with flying colors.
Another highlight of our meeting was the exercise "Repeating Questions." We divided into groups, chose a question related to stuttering or any other aspect of life, and then each person in the group was asked that question repeatedly for several minutes. Here are some of the questions we came up with:
- How do you perceive your stutter when you're at a party?
- How important is it for you that people think well of you?
- What are you most proud of about your speech?
- I understand you're going through a tough time right now; tell me more.
It turned out to be an interesting process. Being faced with the same question again and again forces you to examine it from different points of view and to explore parts of it that you might not have thought of before. Many things in life benefit from this approach, but especially stuttering because it's so easy to look at it one-dimensionally, as something horrible that we have to get rid of at any cost.
One answer that was given stuck with me: "I don't go out of my way to be liked; I'm myself and let people make up their own minds." It's a great motto to live by. We do what we can to live up to our best selves, and we let everything else go.
